People,

The other day at the grocery store I got this thing called "Batman Bathtime Fizzies" which is perhaps the greatest product in history.

What it is is a package of 30 colored tablets that fizz like pop rocks when you put them in hot water. As they fizz they release this food coloring-esque stuff that gradually fills the tub with color. You can have a straight up blue tub, a red tub or a pee pee yellow tub. You can also can combine the tablets to make a green tub, an orange tub or a purple tub.

I discovered that the tablets also work in other places, like the toilet. I did some performance art with them that Sarah kind of hated. Titles included "bloody bowl," "kermit pee," and, when I put the tablet in the upper deck, "why won't my pee fully flush?" Good stuff.

Anyway, I wholly recommend getting these for yourself but I have my doubts about their availability, since they come in a box that looks like it was made in cold war era Siberia and they were on serious clearance at Wegmans.

Good luck.