People,
This past weekend Ladybetrothed Sarah and I hit the sunny shores of Palm Beach Florida. Here's how it went down.
About three weeks ago a got a call from my friend Dave.
Dave: Hey Joe, you're really good looking and very talented.
Me: Thanks, Dave, what's up.
Dave: Well, the band [Capt. Miles Band - Dave's classic rock cover band] is playing a Christmas party on December 11th. Our bass player can't do it and we could only pay you about $250 but we'd love it if you could sub in.
Me (rubbing two nickels together to try and make a spark to warm my hands by): I'm in!
Dave: Here's the catch. The gig is in Florida and you'd have to travel down with us and stay in a five star resort with all expenses paid.
Me: Really? I mean, that sounds....
Dave: Ok, asshole, you drive a hard bargain, you can also bring Sarah.
Me: You're tough but fair.
And so began our odyssey down south.
On Friday, Sarah and I packed it up and headed to the airport. We flew Song, and it was cool because it was the first flight I ever took where I had a tv in the headrest in front of me. Unfortunately, and this would become a theme of the weekend, no porn. Oh well.
Anyway, we killed the flight off by watching movies. Sarah treated herself to the sure to be Academy Award winning Hilary Duff vehicle Cinderalla Story and I watched the Bourne Supremacy.
Unfortunately the airplane's satellite feed went down halfway through the flick and we had to restart our movies again. Of course, my movie restarted in a spot about 30 minutes past where I was. More unfortunately, the place it came back kind of made sense and I didn't notice the gap. Ten minutes later the credits rolled and I said "Matt Damon was in this?" Damn.
In no time we were in FLA and headed to the taxi stand. It was 80 degrees out and right then and there I was ready to renounce my Massachusett's citizenship. I honestly just don't understand why we live here. I mean, why wouldn't you want to live in a place that is summer ALL YEAR LONG? Haven't we evolved that far yet?
Anyway, we got in the cab and headed to our hotel, which is a story for tomorrow......
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