Rockers,

So.......

Sunday

After the exciting events of Saturday it was time to shift gears, put on our sneakers and hit the birthday party circuit.

First things first - I mentioned in an entry last week that I was going to a twelve year-old's party. This, in fact, was not the case. The birthday boy was actually turning nine. Dag. This unexpected youth worked both for and against me. In the against me column was the fact that I bought the birthday boy the heaviest baseball bat in the world. I went by the recommended size chart at City Sports and they told me a 31 inch bat would be a great present.....for a twelve year old. This bat was literally bigger than most of the party guests. Arg. Speaking of party guests, in the for me column they were all about nine as well, which made it really easy to kick their asses in baseball. Awesome.

The baseball game was very good. I coached one of the teams and we called ourselves "the butt-kickers", which is exactly what we did. The other team was called "the warriors" and they were about as lame as their name.

After the rout that was the baseball game (I hit three home runs, thank you very much!) (Ed. Note - Against nine year-olds, jagoff) an ice cream truck showed up! It was like the greatest day of my life. I had a chips galore even though I promised the kids I'd get a powerpuff girls bomb pop. Oh well kids, you gotta learn that adults will always disappoint you.

Finally, after a hearty game of steal-someone's-hat-and-run-away-with-it, it was time to go home. We all headed to the birthday boy's house, where we had pizza and opened presents, the best of which was a remote controlled fart machine that I personally loved more than any nine year-old ever could.

It was a good day.