People,

So I was thinking on the bike ride today that I have a huge frigging head.

Now, I've always known this. Taunts of "egghead", "huge head" and "you're a jerk with a really large head" have followed me my entire life. But I was reminded of it again today while thinking about my "custom helmet".

What does that mean? Well, when I was shopping for my current bike helmet I was eager to try on all the latest models, the ones the kids and pretty girls would admire. However, none of them fit my aforementioned gigantic head despite being one size fits all. So the salesgirl said to me "we'll have to get you one from the back" and then to a coworker, in a voice no less than a shout, "do we still have those discontinued helmets for people with huge heads?" Alas, they did. Of course, everyone with regular size heads snickered as I paid for my enormous piece of protection and, with as much dignity as I could muster I slunk out of the store.

So why was I even thinking about my helmet this morning? Well, people,.....I think it might be too small. It leaves horrible red marks on my forehead where it digs into my skin and it pretty much hurts to wear.

God damn life.