People,

So, those of you who have followed the recording saga are prolly ass-bored with it by now. But I do feel that I would be remiss in my duties as "the chronicler" if I didn't quickly finish the story.

When we left off, it was Monday of last week and we were woefully unfinished with the new rock masterpiece. As we left Brooklyn we made plans with Mike (producer extraordinaire) and Tim (engineer extraordinaire) to return on Friday for just a little more rock.

Here are the highlights:

- I drove down with Jordan, Beth and Sarah. Now people, this is a party crew. Unfortunately, the car we were in began having steering problems, causing it to pull dramatically to one side and then the other. The only remedy was for Jordan to rapidly turn the wheel back and forth in ordrer to make the car go straight. He did this for 5 hours and swore he'd never be able to masturbate again.

- Sarah and I were going to go stay on the floor that Gordon and I had christened the week prior. Unfortunately that meant getting to lower Brooklyn from upper Manhattan at 11 PM. Arg. En route, I fell down the stairs of the subway, had a panic attack and essentially became sure the world was against me.

- Door to door trip time? 8 1/2 hours

- We slept on a different air mattress than Gordon and I used, which was great because it had a tiny leak in it that hissed really loudly and necessitated re-inflation every hour and a half. That, people, suuuuuuuuuuuuuuucked.

- Saturday we laid down the sweet sweet rock like it was not only our duty but our god given right.

- The next night, Sarah and I tried to patch the air mattress and succeeded in making the leak leak twice as fast. Booo-ya. We had to get up every 45 minutes to pump it back up. It was like a having a vinyl newborn...who you hate.

- Sunday we pumped the Pro Tools rig full of sweet, sassy, and dare I say sexy rock. Seriously, we finally finished and everything came out really well. I can't wait to get it all packaged up and delivered to you, the true rock fans.

Well, I guess that's it folks. That was the record that was. Tomorrow we'll return to the stories of poop that I know you're missing by now.

As Snoop might say, "much love, fo' shizzle"