April 26th - Toledo - The Bottle Rocket

After the events of Champaign, I was pretty worried about Toledo. Add to that that the last time we played there the night literally ended in fistfights and tears and you can imagine the anxiety I was feeling.

Anyway, we rolled into town uneventfully and started unloading. Heide, the club owner, was there to meet us and she is so nice (and offers so much free beer!) that much of my anxiety subsided right away. The only troubling thing now was that we were scheduled as part of the early show, which we thought meant "play for nobody, losers." Luckily, the show was also a record release for a really cool band called the Break-Up and there were actually a TON of people there. We rocked and it felt really good to play for a large, appreciative crowd. Toledo rules.

Ok, enough boring show stuff already, where’s the funny story?

So after the show we were in such good moods and the beer was so far from costing anything that we went, as the natives call it, buck wild. The unfortunate truth was, I probably should have only gone "doe wild" because two hours later I was certain that I was going to throw up something fierce. I would have killed for a bed at this point but Heide was putting us up so we were stuck at the club until the bitter end. In a really weird twist, the late show band was the Demolition Doll Rods, a very cool and actually very successful band from Detroit who play crazy punk songs in g-strings and bondage gear. Despite my state they were awesome. However, there was this one dude who looked like he had drunk a keg and a half and then topped it off with a kilo of meth who just wouldn’t leave the singer alone. Every time she turned around he would grab her mic stand and hit her in the butt with the mic, as if to say "do you get it? This could be my dick. Do you get it?" Yeah, dude, we get it, you’re amazing.

Anyway, a little later I’m in the bathroom. This same guy and a friend of his come in together and are talking pretty loudly. I have earplugs in so I can’t hear what they’re saying, but I’m pretty sure they’re talking about me. Suddenly, this guy claps me on the shoulder really hard and won’t let go. I, of course, freak out, shreik and run out of the bathroom without even finishing. I'm a very brave man. And as if that weren’t enough, later in the night Gordon and I are talking when this very same guy comes up behind Gordon and whacks him in the head for no reason. He then turns and walks away without saying anything at all. Now, I don’t use the word crazy very often, but people, that guy was CRA-ZEE.

It was a wacky night to say the least. I also did not vomit so yay me.

Tomorrow - Cleveland!!!!