Fooled By April plays in Worcester Part V: In which it takes a turn for the way worse

So,

After we solved the directions snafu we found ourselves on the Mass Pike at 3 AM. And I tell you, it was 3 AM and I wasn't lonely but I was really really really tired. So tired that the lines started blurring and I could feel myself kind of being hypnotized by the road. That, my friends, was a good time for a Twix bar/Diet Coke pit stop.

And so we stopped at the Natick travel plaza. Gordon got some gas while the rest of us ambled inside for a pee and to see whether McGriddles were on sale yet. Actual conversation with the teller, who was a charming albeit not very straightforward Indian gentleman:

Me: Hi there, are you serving McGriddles yet?
Charming albeit not very straightforward Indian gentleman: No, no McGriddles.
Me: OK, I'll have a McFlurry.
CANVSIG: No McFlurry.
Me: OK, just two apple pies then.
CANVISG: No apple pies.
Me (getting frustrated): Can I get a cheeseburger?
CANVISG: Of course, my friend.

Anywho, I had a cheeseburger. After the burger we all headed back to the van, which for some reason was still at the pump. Oh well, I figured Gordon was just tired and didn't want to park it. But I was tired too and we then had this conversation:

Me: Gordon, are you sober yet? I'm really tired and I was hoping you might be able to drive.
Gordon: Yeah, I'm fine to drive. Wanna give me the keys?
Me: You have the keys.
Gordon: You were driving.
Me: Yeah, but I left them in the ignition so you could park after you got gas.
Gordon: Oh shit. I locked the car after I got gas!

Oh shit was right. And so at 3:30 in the morning we headed back into McDonald's to wait for the Mass Pike emergency crew to come and unlock the door. It stone cold sucked.

When we finally got home at 4:15 I literally wanted to make out with my bed. That's how happy I was to see it. Dag.