People,

My thought for the day is that being in the military sucks.

Now, don't get me wrong. Although I've been called a "candy-ass liberal wimp" more than a few times when discussing things like war I am not, in fact, anti-military. I actually can't get over the fact that there is a giant group of men and women who's job it is to help make sure my candy-ass doesn't get blown up. Dag.

However, I think the job itself and the higher-ups who run the military suck balls. Here are my cases in point from an extemely limited amount of research:

- I was watching the Hitlery...er...History Channel the other night. For some reason they were taking a break from their relentless WWII coverage and had a show about American GI drug addicts in Vietnam. Apparently a number of enlisted men would frequent brothels in their off hours to have sex and shoot heroin. It became something of an epidemic but you never heard about it because the brass were all very embarassed. These guys all came home as junkies and then were essentially abandoned by the government and VA Hospitals because their problem wasn't something like a bullet wound. Dag.

Now, I say that if your job (YOUR JOB!) is to KILL people while having a good chance of being KILLED yourself, then you should be able to do whatever the fuck you want when you aren't at that job. I mean, if I thought I might die every day at my job (physically, not spiritually, like I am) then I would be walking into that jungle with an IV drip of morphine in one arm, An IV of cocaine in the other, 11 nicotine patches on various parts of my body, a carton of cigarettes, four twix bars, some bubblegum and my pajama pants.

- Iraq. It's just not a fun place to be. People are shooting at you all the damn time, no one really seems to know what the objective is and people, here's the kicker; the 15-day forecast for Baghdad calls for no days under 100 degrees. None. Nor have any of the last 15 days been under 100 degrees. Today it's supposed to be 104 degrees. That straight up sucks, especially if you're walking around with 50 pounds of crap on your back in a full body suit of camoflauge.

So, thank you Armed Forces, but DO NOT sign me up....